Reasonable rent/chores etc.?

29 year old stepson moved back, pays little rent and does the dishes. Works 25 or less hrs. a week as a waiter and takes to acting cles(wants to be an entertainer). He will be 30 in Dec. My wife and I are not on the same page regarding this situation.. I told him he needs to put his acting on hold and get some real employment to be on his own.. He refuses and she backs him up.. Acting is all he wants to do and he hasn't worked other than Marriott's in Ca. about 8 yrs. ago.. Had a choice to work in Florida for Disney World,but wanted better parts so he didn't act there either. I'm at a loss. .He stays up late and sleeps until 11am daily..(says he has to for acting) takes off to starbucks to "read." and then comes home around 8pm to eat the left overs and sneak off again. I'm sure other parents have been through this before.